Let's Look Each Other in the Face

1st Anniversary - June 11, 2012

Many days can go by without me looking Tyler in the face. Oh sure, I glance at him. I watch him talk and interact with other people. I see his smiles, furrowed brows, puzzling tilt of the head, chuckles, and fear.

But sometimes this isn't enough. I have to stop Tyler while he's washing dishes or editing photos. I must pause Netflix and just look him in the eye. I need to put my face close enough to see the flecks of color, the true state of the soul. It's so easy to merely coexist and kind of be excited for someone's joy, but I need to feel the same emotions, the same moments, the same elements of life my husband experiences.

We do this not only with the people we love, but with everyone else we encounter. So rarely do we take the step to look at someone's heart, to look in their eyes, probably because it scares us that we will open up our hearts to pain and rejection if we chance to care. It's just easy to keep going.

Recently, I had a conversation with a great friend. I said, "Hey. How are you?"

She said, "I'm really kind of tired and frustrated."

I said, "Good."

She did a double-take, and I realized I wasn't even listening to what she said. And I really count her as one of my true friends. Of course, there were 15 other people in the house creating quite a ruckus, but I still didn't look her in the face, listen, discern, understand what and how she was experiencing life. I'm so thankful she is understanding of my short-comings.

Let's look each other in the face. Let's care about how another's soul feels, the state it's in, the pains, and murmurings of the heart. We may have to risk being hurt, but we experience so much more joy together even amidst any pain. Like the Jack Johnson (am I really quoting him?) lyrics say, "it's always better when we're together." Togetherness makes for more joy in life.

Obsessed with this song.

Some Jingle Bells for everyone's holiday season.