T: "Do you think E has been in bed long enough for us to make popcorn without him wanting some?"
M: "No, wait a few."
T: "Why do they keep showing Taylor Swift's reaction to everything?"
M: "Because she has a wedding dress on."
"Look at Justin Timberlake's hair...It looks a lot like yours."
T: "I thought he had curly hair. How did he get it to look so good?"
M: "I think he does. He obviously didn't do his own hair. Justin Timberlake sounds better than Mumford & Sons."
T: "Nice. Black and White for JT's song. People all around America are wondering if their TV just broke."
M: "Oh look. The guy from Maroon 5 has the same hair cut as Justin Timberlake, You, and Andy Hoffman."
T: "Megan Clouse (our hairstylist) was on the cutting edge with that look."
"If LL says hashtag one more time, I'm going to rip our TV off the wall."
M: Stares at him
T: "I'll rip it lightly."
"When I look at some of these outfits, it makes me wonder why we still wear clothes."
M: "Miranda Lambert's dress is just too short to be on stage from this angle."
T: "I think it passes the fingertip test."
M: "No way!"
T: "Maybe she just has short arms."
M: "Oh look, it's another Taylor Swift reaction and arm wave."
"Do you think it's awkward that Rihanna and Chris Brown are at the same show?"
T: "They might be back together."
M: "Has she lost too much weight?"
T: "I like her voice."
"What's the big deal with Bob Marley? I've just never gotten it."
M: "He brought reggae to the world. Look at those dreads."
"I love tattoos. They just look so good, especially when dressed up with a nice shirt."
T: "It's your original sin that attracts you to tattoos. I'll forgive you."
"Taylor Swift again?"
M: "Popcorn time."
"Adele's dress looks like a grandmother or Dolores Umbridge from Harry Potter."
T: "I love it."
M: "Wait. Is she pregnant? She just said the last year's winner got knocked up. Did she win last year?"
T: "I don't know."
"Is that Jack White?"
M: "No that is a random guy with Rihanna. Jack White looks like Johnny Depp's and Tim Burton's wife's child."
"THAT is Jack White with some creepy ghost-looking women."
T: Falls asleep
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