Let's Be Honest - Habits

I'm 26-years-old and I still bite my fingernails. I've never once used fingernail clippers on them. Never.

I like my bad habits. I like biting my nails, chewing gum at all moments, and putting my elbows on the table during dinner. There is something comfortable about our own habits. While they may be unacceptable or social faux pax, they are familiar, comfortable, and homey.

Isn't that why we don't give them up —why we won't give up picking at scabs, constantly checking our phones for new updates, or twirling our hair? They are our comfort. It's what we do when we're on a long car ride and can't sit still. It's the way we clean the refrigerator out when we're stressed. It's a habit, a comfort mechanism. It's wasting all the hours watching Netflix or meandering through Pinterest or BuzzFeed. We love what we know.

It's funny the way we crave our own habits, no matter how disgusting or random they may be, but we are frustrated by or downright hate those of people around us. For instance, I absolutely do not mind when I leave my clothes (habitually) on the chair in mine and Tyler's bedroom. It's near my bed, it's convenient if I don't feel like putting clothes up, which happens regularly, and I can just pick and choose from clothes. This happens especially if I've worn something once but it's not quite dirty enough to go in the laundry hamper.

However, Tyler cannot stand when the chair looks like a clothes pile instead of a chair. And I cannot stand when he takes off his shoes in the doorway to our room, which I inevitably trip over. I can understand him taking his shoes off — hallelujah! I'm home from work and getting comfortable — but at the same time, I cannot stand falling all over his size 11's every time I walk in the room.

Don't get me wrong, we all idealize getting rid of our bad habits. We all think the world would be better if we put our clothes away immediately or worked on that project, exercised, or spent time with friends. However, we cling to what we know, not willing to change, not willing to grasp that ideal.

They say it takes 30 days of not doing something in order to break a habit. I didn't bite my fingernails for 2 months this past summer, and I'm back to biting them down to the quick. It may be that I'm under more stress now that I'm teaching again, it may be that I wish I had long fingernails to paint beautiful fall colors, but I'm still biting them.

Why do we stop ourselves from the process of change? I think it's because of shortsightedness. We choose to only see what is in front of us right now instead of thinking about the long term. Instead of thinking of what we're called to do, how we are called to live, who we are called to live, we think about the latest episode of whatever show is "in" right now or what color to dye our hair. And we find comfort in the habits we know because we're ignoring other important things.

Just some thoughts about habits and why I don't like to change.